I feel like I'll never be the same again. I've lost my 'innocence' and curiousity for life?

I used to be so optimistic, balanced, spiritual (I mean in small, everyday ways like appreciating a sunset or song or thinking that bad stuff happens for a reason) and I used to have a real lust and curiousity for life. I'm only 20 years old but I feel like I've lost a part of myself. I had a really rough year, a horrible break-up that was really damaging followed by my mum being hospitalized and nearly dying from a heart attack, and working for a year in a really stressful environment. I was eventually having anxiety attacks. I saw a therapist briefly also, because my self esteem absolutely plummeted. I finally quit my job and came away on holiday, where amazingly I was offered a new job. I took the job and drastically changed my life by moving away to a gorgeous, blissful, laid-back beachside town in Egypt. I've been here 2 months now and I'm spending everyday in the Red Sea, diving, swimming, having beers with friends in the most gorgeous environment. It's helped mively, and I'm feeling a lot mellower, but I'm also noticing now in the time I've had to stop and reflect that I am still carrying a lot of crap with me. I just don't feel quite the same. I can't look at the world with fresh, excited eyes anymore. Everything seems somewhat melancholy. I want to have a lust for life again, just enjoy every minute and not give a care in the world like I used to, but I just don't feel capable. I don't feel like I can ever be quite so happy again. Please help?