Help me.....my dreams scare me...?

You need to come back down to earth sweetie. You need to take some time and think seriously about what "love" actually is. Would you care about this Kiro guy at all if he wasn't a celeb? Probably not, because it is the "celebrity quality" that attracts you, and not the actual person. Think about what that means. You want somebody to love you, right? Do you want that person to love you because of who you are, or because of WHAT you are? Loving a person because of their celebrity status is like loving a person because of their money. You are avoiding reality so much that you need to have these intense and unrealistic feelings just to feel normal inside. This is exactly the same thing as cutting, except now its mental and not physical. You MUST make a point of only acknowledging the things that are REAL around you. "Real things" are things that show you trust, loyalty, honesty, humility and empathy in some form. They are the things that you have seen for yourself and never the things that have been pointed out to you by other people or popularity. Learn to recognize when something is being genuine and when it is only pretending to be genuine. You must do this with yourself first. There is a part of you that already knows what is real and what is not real inside of you, but you have to acknowledge it. Don't allow yourself to disappear down the rabbit hole just because for the moment its more pleasant in la-la land - there is no light where there is no truth and before you know it you will be middle-aged and alone in the dark.